Remembering

I like to pride myself in the fact that I have a knack for remembering certain events such as birthdays and anniversaries. I was one of those people who sent cards on every occasion complete with all those lil' tiny pieces of confetti that people would curse at after having them scatter everywhere. I even had a "dream job" of working in a card store at Stonestown. I loved it because not only did I get first dibs at checking out the newest cards, but I had a 50% discount as well! Haha, for those couple of years that I worked there, everyone got a card for their birthday, Valentine's Day, Easter, and hell, even St. Patrick's Day!

Back in grade school, friends like Mommy Hernandez and I were HUGE in remembering important events. Her ongoing thing was reminding us exactly how many days until her birthday- "3 more months 'til my birthday," "1 more month 'til my birthday," "6 more days 'til my birthday," and so on and so on. 'Course after how many years of that, I'll have her birthday forever etched in my mind!

Then, there are the death anniversaries. In our family, we often have dinners and rosaries to celebrate the life of our loved one. For example, this month is the 30th death anniversaries of both my grandfather and great-grandmother. It only hit me recently that they both passed away just two months before I was born and only 10 days apart. Because my mom was pregnant with me, she wasn't able to visit the Lola that raised her AND my dad couldn't even see his own father buried because he had to take care of my mom. It's sad that I never got to meet either one and even sadder that my parents weren't able to attend the funerals. I think this is one of those instances of "when one dies, another is born."

Can you believe that I even remember the day I received my beloved Honda? Yes, on March 7, my baby will turn 7 years old! That day was so memorable for me because it all started with an annoying page. Gee, remember pagers?! I was still at State at the time and I finally got a hold of my dad who was annoyed that I hadn't returned any of his pages. Funny, I thought, because when I did call the number back, it was from a car dealership! As I'm trying to make sense of it all, he angrily/excitedly tells me that "my" car is waiting for me at home! I remember turning the corner of my street and seeing this brand new Honda sitting in the driveway- wow! *sigh*...I miss my car.

Of course, there are days that you remember, as if they happened yesterday, that you'd like to totally erase from your mind. Each of us, myself included, have our own painful memories that hit a particular nerve that makes for a terrible trip down memory lane. These make for automatic welling up of tears, frustration for allowing that memory to trigger certain emotions once again, and eventually anger at the blasted event. It's a vicious cycle that people subject themselves to and a cruel joke that our minds play on us. As much as we try to push it to the farthest corners of our mind, it lurks and creeps up on us when we least expect it.

So what's my point with this topic of remembering?

Perhaps I'm just in a rut that I can't seem to get out of lately. There are events that happened a year ago that brings up bad memories and I'm having a hard time shaking 'em off. I have always been a true believer that all things happen for a reason. I also believe that God has a plan for each one of us and all of the bad sh*t that happens in our life is just a precursor to all the good He will provide. All of us will encounter obstacles in this journey of life. We can either bitch and complain about them, or we could do something about it. I prefer taking action because it's all about making choices. It's definitely easier said than done, and though it seems impossible to see the good that can come out of it, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." (All I have to do is keep repeating that to myself...)

Season I

I'm a huge huge fan of Gilmore Girls on the WB and I'm happy to say that the first season is finally making its way on dvd. Whoo hoo! For those of you who share my love to this show, tonight's episode struck a chord with me. Painstakingly, it was difficult to admit that I was both Lorelei and Rory in all aspects. Of course, if you don't even watch GG, you have no clue as to what I am talking about. It's okay, no one has to understand. It'll be my moment and mine alone.

btw: Season I comes out on May 4...