The End of an Era


Today was D-Day...our last day at the apartment. The last few days have been spent driving back and forth, lugging leftover junk back to our new place just to be piled up somewhere, and cleaning like crazy to make the apt more presentable to avoid any deductions from the nice lil' deposit that we should be getting back. I went ahead of hubby to finish up last minute cleanups and by the time I was done, I had about an hour to kill before the management conducted the walk thru. I guess you could say that I had my last moments with the apartment, my personal farewell to it. I went through each room to make sure we didn't leave anything behind. I did my whole once over glance, heaved my resignating sigh as I recalled certain moments or conversations that took place, and then proceeded to the next room. Of course it didn't take too long, but as I looked around the empty apartment, empty walls, and freshly vaccuumed rugs, I remembered the excitement of moving into a brand new place.


Aside from the whole moving process being a major pain in the ass, memories of moving out of California came rushing back. Although it's been over a year (a year and four months to be exact!), the adjustment has really been tough. Geographically speaking, it's been rough not being able to get in my car and drive an hour to visit my sister, go to my parents for dinner, and hell, even drive that 10 minutes to the nearest Baskin Robbins for that mochablast I'm always craving. I've missed all the many get-together dinners, walk and talks, theme parties, birthdays, weddings, and all the other events that included seeing and hanging out with family and friends. Sure we've made some friends here, but it's just not the same. Plus, of all things, it pains me that we're not anywhere near a body of water..namely a beach.


BUT...it hasn't been all that bad...with the exception of the weather. The weather? Shoot, I can bitch about that all day and all night. In fact, we were having "warm" weather today..if you can call 26 degrees warm. It finally hit me that what I've been muttering as the "crazy Minnesotans" who dress in shorts in this weather really are NOT crazy because hell, after having bouts of negative 15 degree weather, anything above that is, indeed, warm. I actually went out today without my scarf and gloves. On the real though...Minnesota hasn't been so bad as I might've made it in the past. First of all, we've met some cool people from church and second of all, we've been running into fellow Californians who, like us, are moving to MN because of job opportunities. This might seem odd, but it comforts me that we're all in the same boat so to speak. There's that connection that these people know what the world outside of MN is like. It has definitely been a culture shock for me and hubby. In all honesty, I just haven't been around so many white people in my life, is that funny? I do miss seeing fellow brown-skinned folk. You'd be surprised at how diverse MN really is, but really, it just ain't California.


Being away from da Bay has allowed hubby and I to really get to know each other MORE, for better or for worse. Things aren't always peachy keen, but we work through whatever comes our way. Now that our lease to the apartment is finally up and we had just closed and moved into a brand new house, well, gee! This is a huge step for us! Hubby calls it an "end of an era" and yes, in many ways it is. I also like to call it a beginning of a new chapter in our lives.


New Year's is always a time for reflection, isn't it? We all look back at how the year transpired and whether they were all good, bad, happy, or sad, it's time to look ahead to what tomorrow brings. We look back at our mistakes and vow to learn from them. We look at relationships, see how they've grown, and if things have gone sour, look for ways to amend and resolve them. New Year's is really about leaving all the bad shit behind and starting with a clean slate. Although realistically speaking it may not be a totally clean slate, with some changes in attitude, perspective, and heart, one can be on their way to the much needed brand new start that their life has been needing.


I have many hopes and dreams for 2005. My expectations are much higher than last years and I believe everyone should always aspire for more, too. Although we don't know what the future holds for us, we can at least take it one day at a time. With all the devastation, war, sickness, disaster, and hate that is plaguing our world today, we owe it to ourselves to make the best of the coming year. If you have given up on making resolutions because of the liklihood of breaking them, at least make one. It's sounds cliche, but tell family and friends that you love them. Those three lil' words will be the most powerful words you ever mutter, but say them and say them often. You won't regret it.


SOOOOO....what started as the 'end of an era' recollection of our apartment experience in MN, it has ended with an entire New Year's reflection on my part. See how rambled my thoughts can be sometimes! Aiya!


Wishing ya'll a Happy and prosperous 2005! Whatever you do, wherever you are, and whomever you're with, be safe. And if you're silly, short, and superstitious like me, don't forget to jump at the stroke of midnight and make sure you jingle them coins in your pocket....much love always.


*Birthday love goes out to M.Lapid who celebrated her 32nd birthday!*