Tough Day

*When school rolls around, I love getting to know my students on a more personal level. I love getting to know more about them, their likes and dislikes, and just general tidbits about their life and their personality. To me, it's my bonding time with my kids and it's the time when I establish our class as a FAMILY. A teacher friend of mine commented how great she thought it was that I always take the time to get to know my kids. Personally, if I don't get down to that level with them, I feel that I will have a difficult time connecting with them.

With that being said, when something happens to one of my family members...one of MY kids...it affects me. I didn't even know her. I didn't even know she was ill. A mother of one of my students passed away last night. She had been battling liver cancer for some time now. When the father took me aside this morning to let me know, I was overcome with so many emotions. I was surprised that he allowed his son to come to school today, but he reassured me that school was where he needed to be. The father looked mentally and physically exhausted...and when he asked me to help watch over his son, my role as this kid's teacher was brought to another level. Of course I will do whatever I can to be there for this student, but it just makes me wonder WHY he had to lose his mom at such a young age. Of course, God has a plan for everything even though we may not understand it at the moment, but my heart breaks for him, for his sister, and his dad. After his dad left, I wanted to cry. I wanted to take this kid and give him a big hug. I did take him aside and gently told him that I knew what happened. Quietly he did tell me that he's okay...he's a little sad, but he's okay.

Throughout the day, I kept my eye on him...perhaps because he might've been prepared for what would happen, it seemed like any other ordinary day for him. He played with his friends at recess, he did his work, he participated in class...anyone else would think nothing of his behavior...just another typical 3rd grader.

I don't deal with death well...some people do, but I'm not one of them. I just pray the God comforts their hearts at this time and that He will use me in the way my student needs...

*I have another student...I believe I dubbed him as the "winner" in another post...my challenge of the year, my special kid. I have been praying for more PATIENCE these past couple of days because I am SO in need of it! Something is "off" with this child...I'm no expert at child behavioral problems, but I firmly believe he has ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). It's a mouthful, I know. Knowing that I would have this student since last year, I got a book to do some research. As I reread it, I find myself checking off many areas that point to it. The thing is, he's never been professionally diagnosed...and it will be my task to bring that up to his dad.

I feel like I've been getting through to him. Compared to the many times he was in trouble for one thing or another, I remembered he would throw these tantrums and would REFUSE to move or do anything at all. The teacher definitely had a difficult time...so much, that he had to be moved to another class mid-year. So far (keep your fingers crossed...), no tantrums. When I take him aside, he may be crying, but he is responding to me. When I ask him to sit or stand, he does it. But at the same time, his fuse for anger is very short...and he's not afraid to let it out even if someone else is hurt in the process. He's smart, bright, energetic, excitable...at the same time, he provokes others, doesn't listen, argues with everyone, gets in trouble for doing the exact same thing to others that he doesn't want people doing to him. It's so frustrating. I am trying different approaches. But today?

When did throwing food become a good thing? I'm sorry...fries are not meant to be airborne! And do people need to move out of the way for YOU when you are walking through? Do you really need to shove them aside? I don't think so!

With the flying fries, I was SO TEMPTED to throw some at him just so he could know how the other kids felt like....SO tempted...of course I didn't! Sheesh....lol.

He's a good kid...all of them are good...all I'm saying is that if there is something wrong with him, it's better to know now so that we can better deal with the situation. Today just happened to be a BAD day...

*Last, but not least...and because things ALWAYS happens in threes....I received the official divorce papers in the mail. Don't get me wrong, it's definitely a good thing...but with being overwhelmed by the passing of my student's mom and being frustrated with this particular kid, seeing those papers (signed, stamped, totally official) was very surreal.

*Oh...and did I tell you that today was Back to School night for the parents? It's been one long ass day...why God allows things to pile up one thing after another, I'll never know...but I'm sure somewhere in it, there's a lesson to be learned. In my weakness, I question whether or not I can do all of this...but I am reminded that it's only through Him that I can. (Philippians 4:13)