The Message

I was really looking forward to going to church today. My heart was open and ready to listen to the message of God's Word. Unsurprisingly, the message hit quite close to home today because it dealt with teachers, aka leaders. Instead of discussing how to be an effective leader, the pastor focused on what it was to be an INeffective leader. The pastor delved into the various characteristics of how to lead so no one would follow and as a teacher, I was forced to reflect on my own attitude towards teaching others.

Looking back at the past week, if I had to rate it on a scale from 1-10 with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst, I would give the thankfully short week a 3. I must say that the kids aren't really bad, so to speak, they are just unbelievably full of energy and excitement. In other words, they really just can't shut up! Lol! While I may not consider myself to be on the strictest teachers out there, I do have certain expectations of how my students should behave. I tell my students that anytime outside of the class is THEIR time- to play, to talk, to scream, to run, to go crazy, etc- but when they are in the classroom, they are on MY time. MY time consists of trying to do their best to pay attention, learning, and leaving all the fooling around at the door. For 8-year old kids, this is quite the challenge and I do understand that...which is why I strive to have a classroom that makes learning fun. I just need the children to understand that there is a time for everything...and if and when you choose to talk during classtime and/or when I am in a middle of a lesson, etc, I will NOT be a happy camper.

Maybe it was the warm weather that made them excitable...or maybe there was an invisible leprachaun that was "forcing" their mouths to open and make noises at inexcusable volumes. Ask any of my kids and they would choose the leprachaun story, hands down. All last week, I found myself raising my voice and losing my patience way too easily. And I really do not enjoy being loud like that. It makes me cranky. I tell my students that hey, if you give ME a good day, I will give YOU a good day. If you give me a bad day, LOOK OUT because I can definitely give you a bad day back. Now, I'm not one to assign tons of extra homework...Lord knows I am still trying to get the kids to finish the assigned work in the first place! But really, if I'm having a bad day, it is so not conducive to learning...and it's a major waste of time. And in all honesty, there was a lot of wasting time last week. Again, I was not a happy camper.

It kills me because we have an upcoming field trip this Friday. I mean, you would THINK that the kids would be on their best behavior. You would THINK that they would try and do their best not to get in trouble. You would THINK that right after I reminded them of the rules that they would follow them. You would THINK, right? W-R-O-N-G! I don't get it! I was VERY close to cancelling this field trip because I really don't think they deserve to go.

Last Friday, we had a teacher in-service. Those are fun. Really. Pshhhhh...NOT! But the ending activity did stand out to me. Basically, it was a reminder that each one of our students has and IS a hidden gift inside and as teachers, our goal is to find it and nurture it. Going back to today's sermon and how to be an ineffective leader, it made me question how much heart I put into being with the kids. Hands down, I love being in the classroom. I love interacting with the kids, getting to know them, teaching them something and seeing that "a-ha" moment when the light goes on in their head. And these kids totally crack me up, too! But with all the excessive talking and "naughtiness," I'm thinking whether or not my reactions to their actions were reasonable. Yes, they broke the rules. Yes, they were LOUD. Yes, they were pushing my buttons. Did they deserve my wrath? ;-)

Some things about ineffective leaders:
- they tend to focus on externals, rather than internals. In other words, they are just worried about their image and don't really care about the deeper impact they should be making.
- they relish special treatment. For example, they enjoy the perks of being a leader and they love and crave the attention- focus is on THEM and not the students.
- they place impossible demands on others. Our goals as teachers and leaders is to help kids be successful...learning is a step by step process.
- they repeat the mistakes of their predecessors. Are we learning from the mistakes of others or are we sticking to the same routine?
- they keep others in the dark. As teachers, are we sharing the brilliant lesson ideas or keeping them to ourselves? Why not share the wealth of information to benefit ALL kids and not just our own individual classes?

Today's message really made me stop and take a look at myself, at my teaching, at my attitude towards teaching, and at my attitude towards my students. What it comes down to is having the right heart to do the job...am I giving from the heart? Because I am only teaching temporarily, am I going to work each day with the right attitude or am I only doing the job half ass? I know that I need to be more patient with the kids and in essence, I have this huge desire to make the most of my time that I do have with them. I've mentioned this before, but teachers don't really get to see the fruits of their labor until much later. But if I can make a difference in some small way, even if it's only getting kids to say "yes" instead of "yah," and "excuse me?" rather than "huh?", then I have done my job.

I hope and pray that I am being effective with my students. I truly believe that it is a calling from God to work with children. Not only do I not want to disappoint the Big Guy upstairs or the students in my care, but I really don't want to disappoint myself. In these past few days, my perspective on teaching and working with kids has been amplified. I need to remind myself to look at each student as a gift and not as the kid who constantly talks. They are all special in their own individual way and deserve nothing but the best from me.